The feminine urge to raise my daughter on my own terms

Three reasons why solo-traveling with a toddler feels easier than a routined life, on some days

After traveling solo with my daughter for almost two years, I not only find myself on the verge of losing my mind a little but also feel confident enough to unapologetically label myself as "the solo-travel-mum expert." This self-given expert status grants me the permission to discuss some of the pros and cons of living a life that is, to say the least, atypical.

The usual reaction I get when I tell a stranger how I irresponsibly decided to live my life is a slightly confused look that heavily implies they are questioning my sanity, followed by the question, “Isn’t that super exhausting?” This is often accompanied by a mix of adoration and continued slight confusion: “Respect, I would never be that courageous.” Now, I’m the one who’s confused because, for me, this life doesn’t feel extraordinary or particularly courageous. What truly requires courage, in my opinion, is settling for a life we never wanted to live. It takes a whole lot of courage to ignore our dreams. However, these conversations usually end with a hopeful look, implying the wish for me to respond something along the lines of, “Noooo, I’m not special, you can do this as well, Stephanie.”

I came to the conclusion that bopping around the world with my daughter feels less scary than settling for the mundane. Although I agree that we have to find beauty in the mundane and acknowledge that traveling often serves as a coping mechanism—which I’m somewhat guilty of—it’s still better to explore alternative ways of living than to settle for a life I just copy and paste from others because “this is what we do”. That’s the magic of traveling for me: witnessing how people all over the world design their lives so I can take a little bit of everything and integrate the parts that feel most like myself into my own life.

First of all, let me point out that I’ve probably experienced every high and every low that comes with traveling: travel burnout, struggles, exhaustion, the wish to have a home base, scammers, mosquitoes, dirt (a lot of it), bumpy roads, long travel days, an angry toddler—you name it. So, without romanticizing it, traveling with kids certainly isn’t for the faint-hearted.

Still, I believe it’s, in many ways, easier to manage than a routined life at home. Let me tell you why: